Open Letter to Dear Abby

20 Aug
Trifecta: Week Ninety-One
Dear Abby,
Although I have never been involved with movies or television they have completely ruined my life. I am stained with the brand of an evil man.
For me there will never be a lasting relationship, let alone a first date. My neighbours hide behind closed curtains and locked doors and since I am unemployable; I cannot afford the legal fees to rectify the situation.
Would it be inappropriate under these circumstances, to lie about my name?
Fred E. Kreuger

9 Responses to “Open Letter to Dear Abby”

  1. Clare Flourish August 21, 2013 at 4:28 am #

    “there will never be a lasting relationship, let alone a first date.” The turn-around makes this creepy. Nice.

  2. jannatwrites August 21, 2013 at 11:20 am #

    Oh, this is hilarious!

    Under the circumstances, I think lying about your name is not only appropriate, but highly recommended!

  3. Sarah Ann August 21, 2013 at 1:58 pm #

    What a question? Maybe he should have skipped Abby and gone straight to the deed poll office (UK). (Not sure if it’s as easy to change your name elsewhere.) Lovely use of the prompt.

  4. Draug419 August 21, 2013 at 5:13 pm #


  5. trifectawriting August 21, 2013 at 6:07 pm #

    The only way I can imagine this getting worse for him is if he goes after a degree in sleep therapy. A change in name is definitely justified in this case.
    Thank you for linking up!

  6. steph August 21, 2013 at 6:19 pm #

    Funny! Lying about his name doesn’t go far enough. A legal name change is his only recourse. Good one!

  7. lovelylici1986 August 21, 2013 at 10:49 pm #

    Hahahaha. Poor thing!
    -Alicia Audrey

  8. Marie Lough August 23, 2013 at 1:48 pm #

    Perhaps Frederick Euger! The letter didn’t make sense until it was signed, and then we got the punch!

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