Awakening

7 Jul

Photo Fiction: Sunday July 7th 2013

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Photo credit:http://kattermonran.com/

I am hoping you will bear with me this week. I almost let this weeks photo pass..it is difficult to explain the reaction I had when I saw it.  My story this week is not fiction so please forgive me.

Breasts are very important. According to magazines, advertisements, and media in general. They are what makes a woman appealing. The bigger the better the tighter the sweater the adage goes.

Feb. 2011 : The time between biopsy, diagnosis and partial mastectomy was a mere three weeks. Not enough time to process the dynamics of the thing. Only family and very few close friends were told. Even to this day it has remained a guarded secret.

I rationalized that

a) I did not want people to worry

b) I did not want pity

It was not until the recent announcement of Angelina Jolie that I was struck smack in the face by the truth. I found myself thinking how difficult it must have been for her making her first public appearance afterward knowing that all eyes and cameras were on her chest.

The truth of my silence eked its way in. I did not want anyone to know because I felt ashamed. Although my husband has never shown one ounce of reason to make me feel this way. I saw myself as less of a woman. Below standard ( so to speak).

Then I began paying attention to people around me and realised that the only person who noticed was me.

So this my friends is my coming-out . Yep, there may be something missing but I have discovered that I am still the me I was before.

P

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19 Responses to “Awakening”

  1. Gabriella July 8, 2013 at 1:55 am #

    Very moving piece!

  2. Alastair July 8, 2013 at 1:59 am #

    Thank you for this post. It must not have been easy for you to write. I am proud of you for doing so.

    I don’t normally reblog posts from this, but you are an inspiration. I understand you not wanting to say anything to anyone.

    Thank you for using my prompt as a base to use for telling people.

    • high five and raspberries July 8, 2013 at 5:05 am #

      I woke this morning fully determined to delete this post. Thank you for the kind words.

      • Alastair July 8, 2013 at 5:27 am #

        If you still want to delete, I will understand. I do hope though, that it will stay as there are many, many women (and men) who are terrified because they feel less of a person due to having part of themselves removed.

        You have shown that you are a brave woman and that there is no shame in having the operation.

        You are an inspiration and you are brave.

  3. mybeautfulthings July 8, 2013 at 3:45 am #

    Just sending love and respect your way. 🙂

  4. vishalbheeroo July 8, 2013 at 4:01 am #

    keep the cheers and positive energy. You are very courageous:)

  5. Lyn July 8, 2013 at 7:38 am #

    Good for you “P”, you’ve shown an enormous amount of courage. Sometimes we’re own worst enemies when we think we are less of a woman if we are without breasts whether because of ‘nature’ or through surgery. All the very best to you now and in the future.

  6. misskzebra July 8, 2013 at 8:46 am #

    Thank you so much for this piece! You’re so brave!

    I’ll be honest, I put off going to the doctors for six months when I started having problems with my breasts because I was so terrified what the diagnosis might be.

    • high five and raspberries July 8, 2013 at 8:00 pm #

      Hopefully your news was good

      • misskzebra July 9, 2013 at 4:51 am #

        I went to my GP today for my follow up appointment and they found nothing wrong with my bloods and X-Ray, so they’re referring me to the breast screening clinic. :/

  7. RoSy July 8, 2013 at 11:39 am #

    What a big step to take to bring something major that you’ve been through out in the open like that. I think we are always good at being our harshest critics & worse on ourselves that anyone else.
    PeAce – RoSy

  8. Elaine July 8, 2013 at 2:07 pm #

    Found your story through a rebog on Alastair’s blog. I see why he reblogged it. Your story is very inspirational to all of us who have faced, or could still face in our future. Thank you for the courage and strength you show in order to help others. God bless you.

  9. facelikeafryingpan July 8, 2013 at 2:14 pm #

    One of my close friends had a mastectomy years before I met her and I never knew until she mentioned it. I find that sometimes we are our harshest critics. You are still you and the people who love you LOVE YOU and not the parts that make you.
    This is an awesome post and very important to many people.

  10. zookyworld July 9, 2013 at 7:19 am #

    I think you have a lot of courage to write this. And your discovery in the last sentence is powerful. I’ll echo what other commenters said: you are inspirational with what you’ve done.

  11. anelephantcant July 9, 2013 at 9:00 am #

    AnElephant is impressed by your courage and your honesty.
    He sends hugs with his admiration.
    And well written, incidentally.

  12. EagleAye July 9, 2013 at 9:10 pm #

    I hope you’re doing well, Patricia, and stay as healthy as you can be.

  13. Kim July 10, 2013 at 12:16 am #

    I shared this with a friend who also had a bilateral mastectomy. I hope you don’t mind.

  14. catnipoflife July 21, 2013 at 6:50 pm #

    Very emotional piece! Took a lot of strength to express such personal emotion. This is a great write to share with others.

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